Most of us crave genuine connection, someone to be vulnerable and authentic with us. Someone new that will understand us fully and be able to soothe us when we are fearful. However, once that comes, it could knock us off center without warning. Confused and unsure in the whirlwind of questioning what's true, we are reminded of the existing shadow self; Not only that we hold that aspect, but the person in front of us has one as well. There is no reflective shimmering brightness, without the dark underbelly. Chances are, these tender shadow selves will find the dance of war simmering beneath our sweet conscious excitements about this lovely new person that fills our hearts with joy. There is a feeling that can barely be felt, sitting and watching, hearing the quiet shuffle of the dance that can be possibly traced as intuition. Most of us have been here with new budding love. The sweet moments in safety that turn fast, pivoting towards cramped space, with no way of getting to the lovely path you once walked a few moments ago. This new path looks unfamiliar, winding down, the deeper you go, the uncharted tender places of hurt jabbed; the pain expressed in defenses, pushing, pulling, and domineering. These moments are why people close off, and write off men, women, dating, and love. These are absolutely pivotal times of shadow work.
There is a sweetness in being held through the moments of sharp reactions, recoiling in fear. The sweetness is felt when we realize we're still accepted after the storm, the person witnessing us still looking back at us. This person has learned something new, now aware of what we hide away. This is true intimacy. The choice to lean in with curiosity is the lifeblood of intimacy
Much Love,
Gabrielle